UNCANNY X-MEN #278: The Battle of Muir Isle

The X-Men make their move on Muir Isle -- but are they prepared for what they find?

Originally Published July 1991

We begin with the star of the show, as the Shadow King takes us on a magical mystery tour of hate:

Yes, we've got it all folks -- racism, homophobia, sectarian violence in the middle east and Ireland, and of course, mutantphobia. The Shadow King laps it up like a buffet of misery, cackling about how the pathetic humans can't help but debase themselves by resorting to violence over such minute differences, with him as the beneficiary.

Don't you see, people? Your hate sustains him! Lay down your weapons or face the wrath of the Shadow King, who will corrupt you and use you as a puppet... for more hate!

But, Shadow is reminded by his minion, Sexy Lian Shen, what about Charles Xavier, the one man strong enough to stop him?

Yes, the King here is playing that usual "I could kill the X-Men, but it would be more fun to [transform them into my horny minions]" song that all villains do when they find themselves as part of a long-running property where there's no point in even pretending that he can or will be permitted to kill the X-Men, so why not take the reader's mind off of that and focus on something he could (but definitely won't be able to) do.

In a four-page sequence that imagines you, the reader, really like spending time with the various government officials of the Weird Happening Organization who man the hangar where Excalibur's version of the Blackbird is kept, Charles (encased in Shi'ar armor) steals his own aircraft back.

Down/up on Muir Isle (depending on how you look at it) Rogue -- who has meandered over from the Savage Land between issues for want of anything else to do -- and Guido -- who has similarly been drawn to the island off the north coast of Scotland from New York, where he was left behind by Lila Cheney, by a mysterious impulse -- slug it out in gladiatorial combat.

As some of Muir's denizens -- Legion, Madrox, and Banshee's oft-forgotten daughter Teresa -- watch the carnage, Moira presides over the events from a ceremonial seat of honor, decked out in the garb of a highland chieftain.

These Gladiatorial combats serve the equivalent purpose, we are told, of the X-Men's Danger Room: to appraise, test, and evaluate the mutants' individual abilities, but I suspect it's really just so Moira can get her kicks watching the bloodshed.

Why not both?

Rogue, of course, being a qualified longtime X-Person and possessing the cosmic powers of Ms. Marvel (see Avengers Annual #10 - ed.) comes out on top at the end, although it's clear that Guido is a very Powerful Fellow.

On the Scottish Mainland, Xavier and the X-Men regroup. While the X-Men go infiltrate the Isle to see what is the what with Moira and everything, using Forge's backdoor protocol,, Xavier will go to New York, back to the school's grounds, where he can use Cerebro to locate X-Factor, who are currently missing and presumed dead (but what else is new.)

After her fight, Rogue hits the showers, and contemplates the events of the day. Something sure did unlock a violent streak in here during her fight with that Brawny Bloke, Guido. In fact, everyone on the island seems to be acting like a bloodthirsty horny weirdo, and maybe -- drawing on many years of experience during which she has personally been brainwashed several times as have many of her friends -- there's something not right about that.

But... nah, right?

The X-Men drop in -- literally.

Storm has her serious face on, but to Gambit, everything is a game, and he kind of wishes Storm would be her old (read: young) self.

As Banshee steals inside his and Moira's abode where he finds Moira's ceremonial Scots armor complete with a Claymore sword with fresh nicks on it, the X-Men do some more recon. Forge discovers that a buttload (my term) of energy is being diverted to a lower holding cell, which indicates something major must be down there.

It isn't long, however, before Storm is discovered by Legion, the ultra-powerful mutant with dissociative identities, who is also Charles Xavier's son (which isn't important right now.) further complicating matters is the fact that Legion is currently possessed (hey, who isn't?) and the main point is, he's bad right now.

Gradually the X-Men are felled by the Muirians. Banshee gets it worst, being cracked over the skull by his own daughter.

While Gambit struggles against the Multiple Man, and Wolverine and Jubilee are taken out by Rogue and Amanda Sefton.

Back in New York, Xavier has arrived home, or what's left of it. Yes, the Mansion is still razed, but Charles thinks there's a chance to rebuild it, much as they did after it was destroyed by the Sidrian Hunters "Months Earlier" and...

Now, hold on.

Are you telling me that there have only been "months" between the destruction of the mansion in 1982's Uncanny X-Men #154, and 1989's Inferno?

Either Charles has lost all concept of time since being in outer space (possible) or the past year has been such a busy and overall traumatic one that it would make 2020 envious.

But we don't have time for that right now because... incoming!

Charles, who is experiencing psychic static that he believes is the Shadow King's doing, can't sense who would be the driver of the car, but he discovers Stevie Hunter. That instant, the Shadow King appears -- in an astral projection -- to taunt Charles about his victory on Muir Isle.

Oh, and also Colossus is going to murder them both.

Wait, I thought he wanted to keep Charles alive to watch the X-Men become horny slaves? I'm confused.

To be continued!

Further Thoughts:

As we head toward the end -- of this long-running story about the Shadow King -- things seem to be getting a little hectic. In the midst of all this, onetime X-penciller Paul Smith has been drafted back into service as a guest artist for this issue. It's a very strange change of pace from the explosive, leap-across-the-page sexy action of Jim Lee's art. To me, the greatness of Paul Smith's time on the book was how human he made the concerns of the X-Men feel, when they were doing battle with the Morlocks, or the Japanese underworld, or even the illusory version of the Phoenix. Their exploits felt like human actors moving through space in the best way, with gravity and human feeling. The tone of this story, which absolutely suits Jim Lee's artistic instincts, is more high action and adventure, and Smith's style can't help but weigh it down and make it feel a little more static and less vibrant than it should. Given the opportunity, Smith can do this sort of thing -- he pulled off the climax of the Brood story with aplomb after inheriting it from Dave Cockrum (after sort of a rough transition) -- but I think being the pinch hitter here prevents him from being able to work his particular brand of magic, so the art suffers.

(I will note, however, Smith draws a hell of a Shadow King -- his main interest in getting to Marvel was to draw Doctor Strange so he's very at home drawing an evil demonic presence like him.)

In any case, the entire theme of the issue is build. What is the Shadow King about, what is going on on Muir Isle, what is Xavier getting up to on his solo mission? It doesn't make this issue great, but it lays the necessary groundwork for a viable story, a potentially epic battle.

It's not exactly the most sophisticated metaphor, to reveal that the Shadow King basically eats hate and this is all amounting to a big anti-prejudice tract in the end -- it's the sort of thing that fuels special episodes of Saturday morning cartoons -- but being that this is the X-Men and its raison d'etre is to highlight oppression and prejudice of all stripes in the language of superhero action, it's not out of place at all, it's simply a little clunky and certainly not very subtle.