X-MEN #20: Digging in the Dirt

Psylocke and Jean have it out!

Originally Published May 1993

The X-Men have been back from their Mission to Moscow -- er, sorry, make that their Stopover in Siberia -- for a minute or two. Professor Xavier is feeling feelings about it all because the X-Men's state of mind after tangling with the Soul Skinner is once again a reminder that time keeps going by and more and more tragedies keep racking up for the students of Xavier (who aren't young students by any stretch) and things are so much more complicated lately and there's no longer a feeling of innocence. Charles asks Jubilee if she has any particular feelings about the deaths of Ma and Pa Rasputin, but Jubilation, who had to process the deaths of her own parents at a relatively young age, brushes it off as if this was all just some filler arc that will be forgotten in a few weeks -- losing people is what happens in life.

Three she goes again, rollerblading away from all of her problems

Charles checks in on little Illyana, whom we know is suffering a bit of illness, perhaps strep, nobody's sure. Piotr vows that he will never allow any harm to befall his little snowflake ever again.

Now to take a big swig of water before I read Uncanny X-Men #300

Psylocke, dressed in an evening gown made of saran wrap, pays a visit to Cyclops in the hangar, where he is working on the Blackbird. Cyke is so startled by her arrival that he falls and cuts his cheek, which Betsy has a handy way of tending to.

I've heard of tongue-in-cheek before but this is ridiculous!

It soon becomes a full-on makeout session...

But Scott pushes her away, stammering about how he just can't do this, and he's so confused and doesn't know what he wants. 

At that very moment, Jean arrives wearing a sweater made of orange latex. Scott brushes past her, flustered, leaving her somewhat confused and somewhat not, as she spies Betsy and is capable of putting two and two together.

Jean goes to have a big long think about how much innocence she's lost over the years and how complicated things have become. 

Outside, Wolverine is working through some feelings of his own, about the inevitable cycle of loss -- Mariko, little Nathan, Piotr's parents... it's all death, all the time, but before he can get to the part about lost innocence, he notices someone prowling around -- but it may just be Psylocke, based on his senses.

Jean goes to observe Beast and Gambit playing a Danger Room scenario -- as if the high tech murder-gym were merely for "games" -- which gives her yet another chance to ponder all the innocence that has lost around here, then commiserates with Rogue about boy trouble.

Scott, presumably exhausted from everyone being so inexplicably horny for him, decides it's time to bugger off to Alaska and see his grandparents. Maybe he'll get some clarity, chop wood, pet a deer, etc. He leaves without even saying a proper goodbye to Jean, unless you count meaningful, sorrowful looks (which, from Scott Summers, you might.)

Jean finds Betsy in the Danger Room, where the latter is indulging in her recent proclivity for ninja violence. She asks point blank if she (Betsy) and Scott are having an affair. Psylocke makes it clear: there is no active affair, no, but yes, she absolutely is horny for Scott.

Jean goads Psylocke further -- could she be using her telepathic abilities to manipulate Scott? Psylocke answers that question with a question.

Who would have ever thought the X-Men would be fighting each other??

Jean is knocked unconscious, but Psylocke is not left alone. An image of her earlier self seems to have appeared in the Danger Room. An ironic hologram programmed by bitter Jean, she thinks perhaps?

But as the fight goes on it becomes clear that this is no program, no fake. 

This is indeed Betsy Braddock -- Original Caucasian Betsy Braddock -- standing before us, and soon thereafter over a defeated Psylocke. And the rest of the X-Men look on dumbfounded.

Further Thoughts:

Characters in comics don't tend to cycle through a lot of different serious relationships. There might be one or two flirtations before a hero settles down with their One True Partner, whether it be a fellow hero or a civilian. Superman and Lois. Spider-Man and MJ. Cyclops and Jean.

Now, it hasn't always been easy for these two, even after they finally resolved the uneasy, awkward courtship of their teen years. Jean was briefly thought dead, and Scott got into a situationship with Colleen Wing. Then Jean was dead, and Scott fell for Jean-alike Madelyne Pryor. Then Jean wasn't dead and Scott, well... what Scott did in that situation is not something we want to discuss in polite company, but in the end Jean and Maddie became one person so it all kind of worked out. I think people really believe in these two as a couple after all that.

The flirtation, such as it is, between Cyclops and Psylocke, has been a quietly humming subplot on the background of X-Men comics since the two started appearing together in X-Men. It comes at a time when Scott and Jean -- who aren't even assigned to the same team of X-Men most of the time -- are settling into a difficult domesticity. Even though they're formally booed up, they don't seem to have the rhythm right. And into this comes a sexy, available and determined telepathic Japanese-presenting woman perennially dressed in skimpy outfit (who loves it when you barge in on her half-naked after a shower or a swim.) The two aren't exactly sharing deep, personal conversations. The as-yet-unconsummated "affair" consists mostly of distracted glances and long leers at Psylocke's body. It's primal and physical, and let's face it, somewhat more relative to a 13-year-old reader's conception of sexuality than a grown man who has been married, and then shacked up with a woman who looks like 1990's Jean Grey.

What it all boils down to is: Psylocke is hot, and that's a problem.

What I like about it is that it's a uniquely X-Men problem to have, even amongst the famously fractious Marvel characters. Aside from Tony Stark, the Avengers all seem like puritans, and the Fantastic Four are a literal family. The X-Men are a fighting force, a found family, a community, and a school all in one, and one of the hallmarks of being in a school is identifying which of your schoolmates you would want to hook up with and which ones you only reluctantly tolerate... so if you have to step over the head cheerleader to get your man, so be it. It's a distaff counterpart to the Jean-Scott-Logan love wedge.

Psylocke setting her newly monolid bedroom eyes on Scott doesn't make her a bad guy, just an oppositional force to Jean, and so in the context of being teammates with a conflicting interest in Scott, they must have it out. Is it catty and immature and most unbecoming of world-saving heroines? Hell yeah (especially because at the end of the day, they are fighting over Scott Summers) but that's where it's at with comics sometimes. Honestly, the more salacious and in-tune with its heroes' prurient desires and poor impulse control, the better. What, like you've never watched a reality dating show about two bikini-clad trollops screaming at each other over some muscular doofus? I'm here for X-Men comics upping the interpersonal drama in the Merry Marvel way.

All of this happens as prelude to some other crazy reveal, but we'll get to it.