Kitty plays Macaulay Culkin in this take on Home Alone - which is impressive since that film as more than a decade away from release!
Originally Published March 1981
We begin in... the past!
Remember this?
You'll recall very early on after the introduction of the All New All Different X-Men, the team was attacked by a horde of literal actual demons (the N'Garai) who lived inside a mysterious ancient cairn (looks to me like an obelisk but what do I know) that was on the Xavier property, which had previously never been seen, spoken of, or inquired about by anyone who lived there, and whose presence to this day remains an unaddressed mystery.
At that time, the X-Men defeated the demons when Storm zapped the cairn with an extra claustrophobia-powered lightning bolt, destroying the demons' portal to Earth and sending them back to their demonic dark dimension. I'm not sure how that works, but the thing about these comics is that sometimes you just need to accept that things do work. This is a made-up world, see. We're just visitors.
Only, it looks like not all of the demons were sent back whence they came, and one of those crafty little buggers has been lolling about the neighborhood for years, killing and devouring random couples intermittently. And call me crazy, but I think there's something different about the way the demon looks compared to last time. Something a little bit... alien. As if the creators deliberately reconceived this particular demon in the fashion of a recently-popular movie.
Yes, come to think of it, this thing looks exactly like Al Pacino in Dog Day Afternoon. Go figure.
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| The resemblance is un...believable. |
Back at the Mansion, it's Christmas Eve. The Prof drills Kitty on the ignition sequence for the Blackbird Jet. What a completely useless, random thing to be learning at this precise moment on Christmas Eve.
The X-Men are planning a night out, and Kitty Pryde is patently not invited. Literally no explanation is provided for why every one of them has plans and none of them think maybe somebody should stay with the precocious 13-year-old new recruit in a house both riddled with deathtraps and not-infrequently under siege by deadly mutants, aliens and Juggernauts.
Feeling wistful upon realizing this is her first Chanukah alone ever, she tries to call home but gets no answer. Immediately after, the phone rings and it's worse than being alone: Scott Summers, formerly known as Cyclops, is calling in to wish the X-Men a safe and happy holiday.
Scott, we learn, is seeking adventure on the high seas, signing on as a crewman for a fishing boat captained by one Lee Forrester. In an incredible twist, this "Lee" turns out to be... a g-g-g...orgeous woman!
Kitty, sensibly trying to distract herself from existential despair, fires up the Danger Room, albeit in Gymnasium Mode - less lasers and trapdoors, more pommel horses.
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| Kitty also takes a moment to think about Jean Grey, as most people do during the day. |
Before long, however, Kitty gets a burglar alarm. She considers following protocol by alerting the police, but let's face it, if it's the Juggernaut calling, what are they going to do?
Actually, the explanation given is that Kitty had, sometime ago, called them for what turned out to be a downed tree branch - she was too embarrassed afterward to call them for anything but a confirmed emergency. Which, it only seems like a matter of time...
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| Not at all a red flag |
Kitty begins her investigation in Storm's attic apartment, and is quickly face to face with the intruder:
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| You can call 911 now, I think. |
What follows is an intense game of Cat and Mouse, being that Kitty can walk through walls (and floors and, once she "steps" up to them, ceilings) but the demon can tear through the structure of the house like it was papier mache.
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| As the French say...yikes! |
Kitty tries a few ploys to outwit the thing, using her powers to confuse its tracking senses, and later luring it into the Danger Room for one of those patented "much more deadly than parallel bars" workouts.
The monster is relentless, and there appears to be nothing Kitty can do except run until she simply cannot run anymore. Luckily she gets a stroke of inspiration when she remembers what they did in "that movie."
Luring the
But, was it enough?
When the X-Men return, they sense a vibe of evil in the house, but only find their youngest member calmly sitting by the fire in her bathrobe (demonslaying is sweaty work.)
The team has a fun surprise for her...
That's right, they flew Mr. and Mrs. Pryde in from Chicago just for the occasion! It's a very merry happy multi-denominational holiday after all! Ignore the green demon goop on the floor, Carmen!
As to that nasty demon...
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| Sprite: Not to be fucked with |
Further Thoughts:
So do you love Kitty Pryde yet? She's been the primary focus of the last two stories and they are bound and determined to show you what an amazing young person she is. The crazy thing is, if a new character is going to debut, and be emphasized and pushed as the audience's new favourite, this is the way to do it. Put her in situations where she can shine and be shown as a capable, resourceful, plucky protagonist, who is able to cope with intense pressure but still only survives by the skin of her teeth. This issue basically "makes" present-day Kitty.
So yes, this one is very much a deliberate pastiche of Alien. It could have been more coy (by not specifically saying "oh yeah this is just like the movie") but once you redesign the demons to look like HR Geiger's Xenomorphs, you're not really getting anything by the audience.
- The book is theoretically basedon a horror movie but in practice is very much in the realm of superhero action - all the thought bubbles and narration caption key you in to Kitty's ideas and make her seem collected even while being outwardly afraid. This is not a bad thing, since we are reading a superhero action comic. If you were trying to write a horror/thriller/suspense story that actually envinced those thoughts and feelings in the audience, you would write (and draw) the comic differently, with less words, more focus on facial expressions and space within the mansion and the moment-by-moment actions of the heroine and her foe. But I'm highly entertained by putting this spin in a superhero action context.
In addition to checking in on Cyclops, the book also manages to give us some real character moments even in those quick scenes where the X-Men are hanging out. Wolverine brings Mariko around, and Nightcrawler pops by to plant a mistletoe kiss on her cheek, causing even the famously even-tempered Canadian to lash out.
Also:
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| Are you allowed to have a 13-year-old say "sexy" in a comic book for all ages? |
Yes, subtlety is not this book's "thing." Really, Kitty is more bold here than any 13-year-old with a crush I've ever seen
Point of interest: this is the third Christmas story since the debut of All New All Different X-Men. This is also the last time John Byrne draws the X-Men as a main artist. Having reached his limit on "Chris Claremont being a writer" (my words) the two parted, and an era came to an end.
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