Monday, May 10, 2021

UNCANNY X-MEN #213: Psylocke

Uncanny X-Men #213 Cover


Sabretooth brings the fight home.


Originally Published January 1987

We begin with a stranger here...

Closeup on Psylocke using Cerebro. "I am a stranger here."

This is our newcomer, Betsy Braddock, aka Psylocke, who will be narrating the proceedings this week. As you know, she's a British telepath who has been lodging with the X-Men ever since accompanying the New Mutants home from their trip to Mojoworld. It was very fortuitous timing too, since the X-Men just lost their resident telepath Rachel. Completely mislaid her, no idea where she got to.

Well, I'm sure she'll turn up eventually.

Psylocke is using Cerebro to magnify her psychic abilities to coordinate with the X-Men, which causes her to manifest as a pair of googly eyes on a psychic butterfly.

She touches base with Rogue, who is not interested in taking a break from her patrol, even as she wears herself out circling the grounds. Betsy feels her outsider status, with her help being welcomed but not so much her input. 

Rogue tells Psylocke "Don't oyu fret none, Betsy. Ah'm fine. An' more importantly, this is the X-Men's home turf. Protectin' it is the X-Men's responsibility."

She goes on to survey the damage to Nightcrawler (comatose), Colossus (awake but paralyzed) and Shadowcat (permanently disincorporated, contained in a glass jar, at risk of fading away into nothingness.) On that last score, Betsy envies Kitty's spirit, not losing hope. I'm sure Kitty envies Betsy's soliditude.

She goes on to look through the New Mutants' rooms, including Doug Ramsey, who has a crush on the 30-year-old Briton. She notes that if the younger team were in the Morlock Tunnels when the high energy plasma beam hit, they're likely all dead. She can't telepathically find any trace of them, which would seem to be a bad sign.

Betsy regards Doug's bulletin board. "He loves me... more deeply and truly than he  knows. And how do I feel?"
Betsy, he is a child.

(Don't worry too much about the New Mutants -- over in their book, they were in fact in the tunnels but Illyana teleported them out before anything bad happened. - Ed.)

Down in the tunnels Magneto, Wolverine, Callisto and Storm survey the damage. The destruction of the tunnels would seem to be complete, wiping any trace of the Morlocks clean from the place they had called home. Callisto is incensed, and even moreso when Storm suggests that maybe lightning did it, and maybe maybe when she and Callisto were battling and the storm was raging all around them that signified the return of her powers. I don't know, who's to say?

Callisto: "Are you saying YOU'RE responsible for this?!?" Storm: "I do not know."

(The plasma bolt was, in actuality, caused by Thor, who wandered into the tunnels in time to tangle with the Marauders himself - Ed, again.)

(Who's Ed? - Scotto.)

Magneto is a little distraught at the idea that his New Mutants have been destroyed, refusing to accept it, and considering whether this means he should accept the Hellfire Club's offer of membership. Storm is like "Woah, woah, woah, this is the first I'm hearing about this!" and Magneto argues that not long ago the he and the X-Men were the worst of enemies, and Callisto herself still fucking hates Storm; life-threatening situations make for strange partnerships all around.

Callisto: "If I can stomach joining up with you, you can with Hellfire."

Psylocke chimes in telepathically to suggest that she help by using Cerebro to psi-scan all of the United States, perhaps even the whole Western Hemisphere, to find the New Mutants or the Marauders, but Magneto says it's too dangerous and Storm tells her to focus on securing the mansion. I'm not so sure what is so dangerous about looking for somebody, but uh, you're the boss, boss.

Psylocke: "I can do both!" Storm: "Then do as I ask."

After she leaves, Storm explains to Wolverine (who thinks the whole "looking for our friends and enemies" idea is a good one,) that Psylocke is still an unknown quantity and the team has suffered enough. The story doesn't really point us this way but it it sure seems like Storm is still playing it way safe after losing Colossus, Nightcrawler and Kitty in one battle.

Psylocke, for her part, is frustrated.

Psylocke: "The sweet, innocent, genteel, Princess de Facade. How do I show them... the TIGER within?"

She flips on Cerebro anyway, only to get overloaded by a nearby presence.

Psylocke reels back in shock from psychic feedback. "AIRRRGH!"

Okay, point for Storm.

In an interlude, we go to Los Angeles, where we see Alison Blair, still feeling ambivalent about being Lila Cheney's backup vocalist and keyboard-player. Not to mention, a brunette.

Malice: "You're a star, Dazzler! Always were, always will be... do you really believe it's wrong to look like THIS, instead of THIS?"

Her reflection/imaginary friend/evil twin Malice goads her on in these feelings until...

Dazzler emerges from a shopping spree with a new look. "I'M DAZZLER!"

Back at the mansion, Rogue is lost in thought when--

Rogue, lost in thought, is grabbed through a nearby shrub.

That's right, Sabretooth has arrived, and he proves his mettle by absolutely thrashing the X-Men's heaviest hitter.

Sabretooth slams Rogue. "Bang, baby doll--"

Sabretooth makes his way immediately to Psylocke, who is just awakening from the backlash she suffered from 'Tooth's own hostile thoughts. 

Sabretooth advances on Psylocke but she manages to get off a psycho-blast

She fends him off but is too weakened, physically, to use her powers to fry his brain. She runs, and he gives chase. Moira and Nurse Sharon, watching from the infirmary, note that Betsy is helpfully leading the psychotic killer away from the vulnerable triage patients.

Psylocke leads Sabretooth upstairs. "Talk is cheap, Sabretooth - prove it!" Sabretooth: "My pleasure. Hope you like screamin', babe."

They wind up in Ororo's attic, where Psylocke - who began the evening with cracked ribs and now has a bad shoulder, still puts up a hell of a struggle, brandishing one of Ororo's knives.

Psylocke grabs a knife. "Storm's knife! If only I knew how to properly use it!"
Ooh ooh, I know this one -- "stick 'em with the pointy end!"

Unfortunately, Betsy has erred in bringing a knife to a 'Tooth fight, which would normally be a good thing but in this case, not so much.

Sabretooth grabs Psylocke. "That's the spirit! My kinda gal! Defiant to the end!" (Psylocke thinks: "His psychic defenses -- deflecting my psi-bolts! He's too strong--!")

 But just in the nick of time, Wolverine and Storm arrive to intervene.

Storm whacks Sabretooth with a club of some kind. "Tonight -- Psylocke walks free!" Tooth: "Bad move, babe."

Wolverine and Sabretooth square off. 'Tooth wonders if Wolvie is going to "rabbit" like last time, and Wolverine suggests he fuck around and find out.

Sabretooth: "You gonna play this straight, Boy-- or "rabbit" like last time?" Wolverine: "Make a move -- find out."

The two have a wild brawl across the roof of the mansion, down to the poolside.

Sabretooth and Wolverine tumble off the roof into the pool.
No Horseplay!

Psylocke develops a cunning plan, now that Sabretooth is distracted by the pitched battle his mental defenses are lowered - she can slip in and get all the information she needs about the Marauders. Storm momentarily objects since this will leave Wolverine high and dry, but let's face it -- he's enjoying himself.

Psylocke activates her powers while Wolverine and Sabretooth grapple intensely

Psylocke is able to learn a bit about Sabretooth's shared history with Wolverine, as well as the shadowy, ill-defined (possibly not-yet-designed) figure that the Marauders acknowledge as their Master.

Psylocke gets a vision of the shadowy leader of the Marauders.

Psylocke lets Wolverine knows that she has what she needs but before they can take Sabretooth into custody, he dives into the lake and gets away.

Rogue brings Wolverine up from the water. No sign of Sabretooth.

Afterward, the remaining team confers -- the Marauders are probably going to keep coming, so they decide to relocate the wounded to Muir Isle (how they plan on getting them there safely with Illyana possibly dead, I do not know.) Wolverine, impressed by Psylocke's courage and wherewithal, nominates her as the newest X-Man, an offer she humbly accepts.

Wolverine: "Ask me, she's proved herself -- an' then some. If it's what she wants... she's an X-Man." Psylocke: "It's very much what I want, my friend. If there are no objections."

And so, even though half of their team is near death along with innumerable Morlocks, we get a happy smiling ending! Hey, take them where you can.

Storm: Wolverine speaks for all of us, my friend -- welcome to the team!"

Further Thoughts:

Conceptually, and in execution, this issue is an absolute killer. It slays. It's really a cut above. You get me?

Sabretooth thrashes Rogue. "--You dead!"


It makes the bold choice to use Psylocke's first-person narration to take us through - uncommon in this ensemble book (only Wolverine and Storm have gotten that treatment once or twice) - which works great not only to introduce us to the new character but to get us on her side. We learn that as much as Psylocke appears to be a proper lady, she really does consider herself a "tiger inside," and has the chance to prove it against Sabretooth. She is no physical match for the killer, and her powers are failing her, but she uses cunning and other resources to delay him until help can arrive. She makes a great "final girl," to use slasher film terminology.

Sabretooth *crumples a fucking barbell* and throws it at Psylocke.

Sabretooth, meanwhile, gets to live up to every bit of hype that was pumped into him for his previous appearance that never quite came to be, distinguishing himself as a one-man wrecking crew, probably the most formidable Marauder, and definitely a match for Wolverine.

Sabretooth has Wolverine's blood on his claw. "Tasty, runt -- as always."

Almost lost in the fuss is the fact that the injured mutants -- including three long-serving X-Men in Nightcrawler, Shadowcat and Colossus - are being moved from the mansion to Muir Island for convalescence. As readers in 1987, we don't yet know whether this means they're gone for good or if they'll be back in the nick of time, but for all the membership turnover there's been, it's hard to imagine this series without any of them. Still, as new members like Psylocke and Longshot are gradually added to the team, it pays to remember that nothing is certain in the world of X-Men.


The art for this issue is handled by Alan Davis, who will go on to be an iconic X-Men creator, moreso for his work defining spinoffs like the upcoming Excalibur than for his considerable work with the main titles. Davis is a pro and does a great job smoothing over the transition with John Romita Jr. having quietly finished up to go work on Jim Shooter's surefire hit Star Brand. Although Davis' strengths lie more in whimsy and lighthearted fun, he is definitely game to depict both the frantic chase through the mansion and the first true no holds barred beatdown between Wolverine and his nemesis in all its intensity.

Wolverien approaches Sabretooth. "You want them, bub. You deal with me, first."


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