Scott and Jean come home
Originally Published September 1999
We begin with Cyclops and Jean Grey, who have returned, once again, from wedded bliss in Alaska or wherever, to help the Professor with his latest behavioral issues. Even Jean can't help but comment on how repetitive this storyline is.
What they find is utter chaos, with the X-Men literally coming apart at the seams. Gambit is so stressed by this new intense regimen (they trained for one day) that he is in the process of leaving, presumably to spend more time hanging out with green gaseous ladies in his solo series.
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| After everyone was kind enough to completely forget your past with Sinister?? |
Scott, for his part, speculates that the whole team is under the spell of Mesmero or Selene or somebody, and it certainly seems like something is making them act like a bunch of first-class a-holes, but we don't get anything more on the subject than idle speculation.
Elsewhere, Little Nina has been kidnapped-ish by her Mannite Family, who seem to think that something bad is about to happen, on the word of a telepathic baby.
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| I don't permit myself to say this often, but here goes: "Umm... okay." |
Back at the mansion, Jean has her conversation with Charles, the content of which we are not privy to. He then summons Scott for a conversation, the content of which we are also not privy to. More importantly, the rest of the team is starting to get anxious and decides it's time to just... fuckin'... leave.
Marrow, meanwhile, continues to work on retracting her bone growths into her body so she can commit to being pretty full-time.
It works, but requires intense concentration, which is broken when Colossus stops by to invite her on their little trip.
Meanwhile -- in space -- Bishop and Deathbird investigate the giant mutant-shaped planet. But it turns out to be a trap, and Deathbird betrays Bishop and leaves him there, apparently having tired of their will-they-or-won't-they dynamic and pivoting to something else.
As the X-Men prepare to depart -- Colossus and Marrow for Boston, the rest for New York -- Charles tells them to just go ahead and quit like the quitters they are.
Meanwhile, Nina looks into Beautiful Dreamer's mind and sees that he's not exactly beautiful dreaming beautiful dreams.
Left behind at the mansion, Charles, Storm and Wolverine begin to think about a recruitment drive. Should they call up the X-Force and see if any of them want to join the big leagues? Maybe Generation X?
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| Anyone have Maggott's number? |
Charles stops Logan right there -- don't you have a solo series to worry about? Wolverine re-affirms his commitment to the X-Men, but Charles doesn't want him, actually. He briefly became one with Logan recently and he did not care for what he saw.
Elsewhere Bishop awakens to find that he might not be where he thought he was.
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| "Excited"? Is that a serious question, Mark? |
Back at the mansion's driveway, Scott ruminates on the fleeting nature of dreams as he watches the now-former X-Men depart (and a mysterious figure watches from the shadows??)
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| Not now, random mysterious shadowy figure! Unless you have a concrete explanation for all the shit going on here |
Wolverine arrives to vent about his unfair dismissal, but is interrupted when Jean makes telepathic contact with Nina, who needs help from Charlie and the X-Men. They'll have to do!
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| You mean I get to spend an extra $2.50 this month and learn more about the Mannites? Score!! |
Further Thoughts:
A lot of the time, I like to know what is going on in a comic I am reading. It's just sort of a hang-up I have as a reader. A little personal preference.
Now, that doesn't mean I need everything spelled out for me. Far from it. Mysteries are good, uncertainty is fine, ambiguity I can handle. I've been at this a long time (reading X-Men comics specifically, consuming media more generally) and I know when it behooves me, as reader, to put in the work. A tease, a hint that something is amiss and you're going to find out what, is vital for storytelling. But I think the key element, something missing here, is that you need to care about finding out the answers to the questions. You need to be made to care by the story itself.
Okay, yes, I want to know why Professor Xavier is acting like such a jerk (aside from, you know, the usual.) But it seems so arbitrary and sudden that I have no real attachment to it. There's no obvious or subtle source that I, as reader, can look at and say "Let's see how these two things intersect." And as for the other X-Men -- are they affected? Or are they simply reacting to Xavier's change? I don't know what to make of it and I'm not engaged.
And now the X-Men are simply picking up stakes and leaving. There is not really a dramatic reason for this, a flashpoint to generate the friction on which drama runs, it's just... the characters getting tired of being in this story and deciding to change the scenery. The arc is called "The Shattering" but that's maybe overselling the momentousness of it. "The Crumbling" maybe. "The Erosion." It's very passive, with the team simply shrugging their shoulders and walking away from X-Manning, which is not usually a good mode for an action-oriented superhero comic book.
As for the Mannites, Nina's freaky little friends, we come back to the topic of being utterly out of the loop. There's a serious miscalculation when a story hinges on characters who are too young and inexperienced to know what story they're in and can't communicate or speculate for themselves. There's no adult here, no guide for readers, no frame of reference or context.
I don't doubt that we'll get some level of sufficient explanation in this Astonishing X-Men series that is being sold to us, but -- much like Bishop: The Last X-Man -- I don't see the tease offered as being worth following up on, and spending my hard-earned allowance at the corner store.
After a handful of sprightly if slight issues, the X-Men are back in the weeds, and badly -- maybe even worse than before. It would be so easy to tell a story like this but including enough elements that readers could sink their teeth into, but in keeping too much back, they've completely lost me, a guy who has spent years reading all the X-Men comics. I expect better.
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