UNCANNY X-MEN #361: Thieves in the Temple

Somehow Gambit returned

Originally Published November 1998

For whatever reason, Storm is in Seoul, being attacked by randos.

Shadowcat is there to lend a hand.

Storm's like "I told you to stay hidden until I needed you" and Kitty's like "Uh it looked like you needed me."

They're there to meet with Black Tom Cassidy -- famously their enemy under normal circumstances.

They think Tom sent the mooks after them in some kind of double-cross, but no, he explains, they're actually his enemies. Kitty's like "why are we working with this guy anyway" and Storm's like "we need the money." Apparently the X-Men are for hire.

Back at the mansion, Wolverine can tell that Rogue has been scouring the Earth looking for Gambit, to no avail.

The rest of the team, meanwhile, is doing their usual petty squabbling as Marrow stole Colossus' sketchbook and there's a whole thing about whose room is whose.

In South Korea, Black Tom explains that his good platonic man friend partner Juggernaut got tricked out of his powers because some dudes were like "Hey, come party with us, we have a whole other Gem of Cytorrak (sp) you can use" and it turned out to be a ruse.

They find him rampaging through Seoul -- apparently they let him have a little bit of Juggernaut powers as a treat. They even let him keep his now-ill-fitting Juggernaut clothes.

They fight because I guess Juggernaut doesn't want any help getting his powers back and is just feeling a mindless rampage for now.

Out of nowhere -- or not, because he's been skulking around in the shadows for a few pages -- Gambit rides in on a motorcycle, back after months (our time) or weeks (their time) missing in action.

I guess South Korea was the one place Rogue didn't look for him. Well, it's a big planet.

Storm's like "What are you doing?" and Gambit's like "Saving you from the Juggernaut??" and Storm's like "We're helping him today???" but he was dropping buildings on everybody so, you're welcome. Notably, Storm does not ask at this time how Gambit got from Antarctica to South Korea, or what all that business with him working with Sinister was about.

She does ask exactly what he is doing here, and the answer is simple -- he's back to being a t'ief.

So it's like "I guess we gotta go to wherever the gem of Cyttorak (or "Cytorrak" as it may be in this story) is kept and, uh, steal it back or whatever."

Kitty looks in Juggernaut's pants (!!) and finds a map to exactly where they need to go, so we need not be bothered with any, you know, story beats or anything in this story.

Back in the good ole U S of A, Colossus goes to patch things up with Marrow, but she's irked that he walked in on her while she was making her vision board.

He leaves her a peace offering, a sketch of her that doesn't suck.

Gambit, Storm and Shadowcat -- quite the little group -- go to the temple on the island of Cheju-Do. They didn't bother to wake Juggernaut up or anything, they just kind of left him in the streets. All in all this globe-trotting mission is proceeding quite briskly.

They get attacked by some more of those mooks, and do well against them, except Kitty falls into one of those piranha pits that are so common in Korea.

But she phases through the wall and finds herself fortunately in the exact room where the gem is kept. Thank goodness, I was worried a story was going to break out.

Meanwhile, a statue comes to life to attack Gambit and Storm, because why wouldn't it?

They're able to blast it to smithereens, and in the chaos Gambit warps down to exactly where Kitty is, somehow. He tells Kitty that Storm's looking for her, and she says "Oh, better go tell her where I am. You wouldn't mind watching the gem until I get back, right?"

When they return to the chamber together, Storm is also surprised to find that the master thief who openly said he was here to take the gem, seems to have left with the gem while they had their backs turned.

Well shit, if you can't trust the career criminal who famously worked for Sinister, who can you trust?

But you know what, maybe there's a chance this is all some kind of misunderstanding.

And you know what? It is! Gambit beats them back to Black Tom and Sweatpants Juggernaut, in time for kimchee. He's a nice guy after all.

Gambit declines a chance to come back to the X-Men, but Storm says "Well, maybe you should come back to the X-Men," and Gambit's like "all right, I will." Kitty finally asks how Gambit got out of Antarctica, and Gambit gives a true answer.

Further Thoughts:

Hey, this was not good. Annoyingly, it also violates my truism that every time the Juggernaut shows up it's great, but here he's depowered and de-emphasized so let's call it the exception that proves the rule. This was a brainless comic that largely whiffed what should have been one of the most intriguing plot points in 1998-1999 X-Men comics, the return of Gambit -- proffering him in a meaningless low-stakes excursion and making no big fuss over his momentous return, only remembering to add some interest in the last panel, which is far too little too late.

In his interview with Lo Spazzo Bianco a few years ago, Seagle complains about having to use Gambit a bunch against his will. Which is fair enough, if you have something foisted on you by editorial mandate it's not going to result in your best work. Still, even understanding that this stretch of X-Men comics were subject to an unusual amount of meddling from above, part of comics writing is going to be serving many masters and doing stuff that didn't originate with you. You have to find something about it to work with and not just throw your hands up and submit the worst possible version. But the other side of the equation is realizing when something's not working and walking away -- which we are only a few issues away from Seagle doing just that.